Marriage and children

Marriage and children - My Choice !

"If someone is not married yet, do not ask if they aren't actively searching. They have their own struggles. I know of certain relatives who asked my parents if my husband and I needed to go to a doctor since we were married for 3 years and did not have a kid yet! I think that is an invasion of personal space, no matter how close you think you are. I am not saying do not care about anyone. All I am saying is be aware that everyone has their own timelines and then there is fate. Do not ask or comment unless you are asked for help. Everyone goes through a lot and may not share everything on FB or WhatsApp. Do not assume things and hurt people. Wait for your turn to be asked, else stay SHHHH!"

I just posted this today on Facebook and it has been receiving a lot of support from people I know. I am aware of the struggles many people face on a day to day basis. I know of friends who tried everything under then sun to have a kid and failed miserably. I would not want anyone to walk up to them and ask them why they are not trying to have kids and whether they think having a child will ruin their beauty.
No! You should not talk like that. Where are your manners? I used to judge people in the past. Now I have learned that everyone has their reasons for doing what they do and I am no one to judge their behaviour or to give them any form of advice. I know i forget it sometimes and become emotional when it comes to people who are closer to me, but hey, I try my best.

My asks from people - Please do not say hurful things like this.
- "Why are you not getting your only son/daughter married? You do not want their income to go out of your hands?"
- " You are not searching seriously. That is why you are unable to get the right profile."
- "Why do you keep saying NO to every profile that I show you? Do not be choosy. You will not get anyone if you are like this"
- " You are 25. You should get married now. If not you cannot have 2 kids by the time you are 30."
- "You are 30 and still do not have kids? Is there any problem between the two of you?"
- "You are 40 and unmarried? WHy did you say no to the profile i showed you when you were 25? See, that is why you are still unmarried".

These are just some instances that I have heard of. I know there are many more hurtful comments. All I want is for it to stop. Be nice.

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