To be or not to be GUILTY!!!!

I am ridden with this constant question in my head - what happened after we walked out of the shop? I cannot imagine even a single second of what happened after that and how I put my son in danger - the accident , followed by trauma that he had to go through, that might be with him through his life.

Am I a terrible mother? A question I ask often these days because of this, and my logical brain says, "Ofcourse you are not bad!", but am sure this is a question that will haunt me. Did I do enough to protect him? Was I careful while riding? Was it my fault? What could I have done to make sure he was okay? I will never get able to get over this.

Guilt tripping is the worst trip to go on! I hope eventually logical brain will take over and my love for the kiddo can justify that I cannot go back in time and change anything anyway!

Happy Reading!

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June - Doctor/Hospital month??? Is this the start of a trend?

June 12th 2014, I went for a regular scan to my Gynec - 37 weeks into my pregnancy and was asked to go for an immediate scan, that followed a suggestion to get admitted right away, and then surgery was scheduled the next day. 28 years on earth and I had never been admitted at a hospital for anything, not even typhoid or chicken pox! And here I was hospitalized for 11 days, 1 pre-surgery, 10 post until my son recovered from jaundice ! And that's the end, I thought ! June 4th, 2022, I was out shopping with my son. My previous blog posts detail the ordeal and how i was again hospitalized for a week for concussion and surgery to my face for bruises. A plastic surgery that didn't change my "beauty". Cut to June 16th 2023, a couple of days ago, woke up with a sharp, shooting pain, like contractions non-stop and ended up getting admitted, drips and pain killers not being effective, to rushing to a scan that helped find the root cause - Hemorrhage of cyst in ovary. Sounds ...

The Man

Last week, this song "The Man" by Taylor Swift, played as I walked into office. It felt like a great way to start my work as I marched into my floor and inside my cabin. Pumped, I start my daily routine at work and as I get through the day, I realize I enjoy my work and that I am good at it. Would I be at a different level if I were a man? Maybe. But I would rather go through my journey my way because we cannot keep regretting what we cannot change. However, I do lend that hand to a younger woman and guide her so she learns from my mistakes too and can work smarter. I make sure I am the person representing my girl-tribe in moments where their skills are sought for. This also reminds me of Cher's interview where she says that instead of marrying a rich man, she was the Rich Man ! I'm so sick of running as fast as I can Wondering if I'd get there quicker If I was a man And I'm so sick of them coming at me again 'Cause if I was a man Then I'd be the m...

Good morning, and in case I don't see ya, good afternoon, good evening, and good night.

Some days when you don't want to start on some new show and you don't want to watch something without knowing the ending, you'd go back to shows or movies that you have loved as a child. Yesterday was one such day. I went on to watch Jim Carrey's "The Truman Show". When I watched it as a younger person, I liked it for Jim's acting and the entire storyline seemed outrageous and yet heartbreaking. How can one person's life be in front of camera all the time and how can one be living a lie ! Present age, in 2024, when I watched this, I saw it in a different light. With social media being rampant, with everyone having access to cameras on their phone to instantly capture a video, no one can escape being a "Truman". Any instance of your life can be captured by someone and you could end up being ridiculed or hailed a superstar overnight. The superstardom can fall overnight too, but the ridicule remains long after it subsides too. We also live a li...

Chupke Chupke...Shhhh..

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